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My back is giving me trouble, as it does off and on.

It’s not bad, this time.  I don’t need muscle relaxers, pain pills or the back brace. It is bad enough to make me cautious, though. I don’t want it to get any worse.

I take ibuprofin every four hours. I do ice therapy, though not always on a regular schedule. Whenever I feel the pain worsening or my back threatening to go into spasm, I get the towel and the bag of frozen peas – saved for this purpose alone, as I don’t eat cooked peas – and sit with the ice on the small of my back for twenty minutes or so.

I sleep on the couch when my back hurts. I can let the dog out, then, without having to navigate the stairs. I can press my back against the back of the couch for support, and use the arms as  a hand-hold for getting up and down.

It is in this room, when sleep comes in fits and starts, where firelight and moonlight dance around the room all night long, that the dead come calling.

Night before last, it was my mother that visited my dreams. She was about my age, and healthy, and chatty. She was advising me about some problem I was worrying over, that I can’t remember now. Her voice was just as it always was; her attitude was down-to-earth, practical, and exactly what I’d expect of her. It wasn’t as if a saint or angel or any manner of ghost was here. It was just my Mom, stopped in for a visit.

Last night, I had a good chat with an old dry-waller. My friend, Mike, died last year. He had been struggling for quite a while to recover from a bad fall, had finally been released from the care facility, and was going fishing. I was told he had just cast his line out into the water when he collapsed and died. It made me smile when I heard it, as I knew that’s how he would have wanted to go. Last night, he looked me right in the eyes and we laughed and talked just like we did the last time he was on Beaver Island.

This night, after a dinner at Aunt Katie’s that involved a great pile of steamed crab legs and plenty of drawn butter, I iced my back, took my medicine, and was asleep before 9PM. This night, it was my Dad that came to see me, to talk about dinner. I don’t know if my father liked crab legs, or even if he’d ever had them. He liked good food, though, and he loved seeing people enjoy a meal. I certainly enjoyed those crab legs tonight! Maybe it was the food that caused the dream…or maybe Dad just wanted to talk.

When things like this happen, I don’t like to overthink it. I don’t need to suppose that pain or medicine or seafood caused wild dreams. I don’t have to wonder if it was a spiritual encounter. I was fortunate to have good chats with people that I can’t normally talk to anymore…and that’s enough.

 

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7 responses »

  1. How suprising to read your blog today as that is exactly what happened to me last night. I was feeling down as Christmas and New Year’s came and went without the usual hoopla and maybe that is why but Mom and Dad both visited me in their truck (they never owned a truck in their lives!) It was strange and yet relaxing to see them both again. I know that my mom is my guardian angel as she as saved many a number of times from what could have been disastrous events. I guess it is the season and this too shall pass – spring will arrive and we will begin anew! Plus golfing will start! Enjoy winter on the island and maybe some day I will come visit~/

    • I think this is a magical time of year. My brother and sisters also tell of dreams or “visitations,” and often feel that our parents are there when we get together for holidays. It can be explained in any number of logical ways, I’m sure, but I know I miss the departed especially around the holidays…and I like to believe that they miss me too! I’m so glad to hear that you enjoyed your visit, too! Thanks for reading, Laurie, and for taking the time to comment. It would be lovely to see you here on the island!

  2. Love this post, Cindy😍 The firelight and moonlight sentence was so both descriptive and emotion evoking. I might think about sleeping on the sofa more often😉 Hope your back feels better soon!

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