Today is my day off. Oh, precious, wildly anticipated day! I look forward to it intensely for each of the six days leading up to it. I count down the days until my day off…can hardly wait for my day off…want my day off to hurry up and get here…until I have to chastise myself for wishing my life away.
I had a good portion of this summer off. I took to that lifestyle as if I were born for it! Long, lazy summer days stretched ahead of me…until suddenly they didn’t. Work took the place of leisure. Stress filled in for calm. And every day I look ahead to the one day when I don’t have to go to a job.
I have such momentous, big plans for the things I will accomplish on this one measly day that I must believe myself to be superhuman. Me, who can barely find the energy to make a meal and clean up after it on any given workday! I imagine my day off to stretch on and on…yet here it is more than halfway over with. Already.
I’ve gotten some things done, sure. My morning routine includes writing, drawing and studying while drinking several cups of coffee. I also fit in a little meditation, some yoga, and the morning news. These things are standard whether I’m working or not. Today, I had an appointment, so planned a trip to the Transfer Station and to the Post Office, as long as I was going to town. Trash and recyclables had to be loaded into the car, letters written, payments made, and everything sealed and stamped for the mail.
Home, the dogs and I took a long walk. I wandered through the garden, then (one cucumber, two tomatoes) and through the berry patch (about one cup of ripe blackberries). I carried my paper trash out to the fire pit and burned it. I warmed leftovers for my lunch. I checked the long string of messages on my phone’s answering system, and jotted down numbers to return calls.
And that brings me to this moment, sitting here at the computer, with the day half-gone, and a whole long list of things classified as ought-to-do, want- to-do and have-to-do. And as I sit here, I think, “I’ve worked hard all week. I deserve a break!” Ah, yes, let’s concentrate on the pause!