It seems, these days, that my head is filled with lists of things I need to do.
I wake up, usually, about two AM, running the items through my mind. I’m out of bed by three, with a cup of chamomile tea, shuffling through papers or writing things down. I rarely accomplish anything worthwhile in the middle of the night. If I’m lucky, the tea and a bit of activity will allow me to fall back asleep, so that my nocturnal worrying doesn’t spoil me for the day ahead.
I feel overwhelmed in my life.
There seems to be no area that I’m not behind in.
When I am at my main day job, I’m able to focus on that. It keeps me busy enough to hold my attention.
It’s when I’m home that everything else crowds in.
Housework, laundry, home repair, special projects, yard and garden maintenance, dog-walking, bill-paying and letter-writing.
That’s just my personal life.
The news magazine has a whole list of its own, of things to write…or plan…or send…or do.
Then there is the studio, with paintings and collagraphs to finish and other ideas to flesh out. A daily drawing practice planned and abandoned. A new collaborative project, and thirty canvases waiting. Ceramic wares to be fired…big plans for a new kiln…no time.
There are stacks of books in progress, or waiting to be read.
November is just around the corner. Last year, I wrote a blog post every day of that month. I’m thinking of trying it again this year. It seems my writing has devolved into long tirades filled with whining and complaint. Would writing every day get me past that, or just indulge my self-centered ranting? Do I really want one more obligation? Am I crazy?
Yesterday, facing my day off, I was up in the night plotting all that I would accomplish. I took to the couch at 6AM, and slept until after nine. UGH! Rainy outside, I was able to set aside the mowing, raking, pruning and pulling that might have otherwise competed for attention.
In between loads of laundry, sweeping and scouring, I managed to finish a couple projects that have been waiting.
I assembled a new box spring, to support the mattress of my double bed.
I was not dissatisfied with my single bed. It actually gives me a bit more room to move around in my small bedroom. That is doubly important ever since I moved Mom’s cedar chest and Mrs. Valaquet’s hand-me-down dresser into the space. However, last year, while attempting to drill through the wooden headboard, to lower the height of the mattress so that my little dog could get on and off on her own, I split the frame. Since then, the single sized flat springs topped by single sized mattress have been sitting on top of a twin-sized metal bed frame. Though the difference is small, it’s enough so that every time I roll over or shift in bed, the mattress slides off one edge of the frame, and sits at a slant until I get up to fix it. The mattress is not the best, either. Lately, I’ve been looking longingly at the double bed.
I have always liked the double bed. My husband and I found the frame on the roadside, on sale for twenty dollars, many years ago. I had just bought a new mattress for it when – in an allergy-induced fit of purging the house of anything that might harbor dust mites – I got rid of the old box spring and stored the bed.
I tried to make a mattress support for it several months ago, in the middle of the night. With a hand saw, I trimmed a dozen 1 x 6 pine boards to fit precisely between the metal side rails of the bed, arranged them as planned, added the mattress, sheets and comforter, congratulated myself on a job well done, and got into bed…only to have it collapse. Evidently, pine boards have too much sway. So, in the middle of the night, I had to clear away the boards, stash the mattress, metal headboard, foot board and side rails in the attic, pull out the frame and mattress for the twin bed from the same small attic (a task that involves more coordination, planning and ability to pirouette than I have, thank you!), remake the small bed…and done.
This product, designed for supporting a mattress, should be better. It came through the mail several weeks ago, in a surprisingly small box. Though it’s called a box spring, there are no springs. The box contained several pre-drilled pieces made up of boards and spacers, bolts, nuts and screws. In order to have room to assemble it, I would have to commit to – once again – disassembling and storing the twin bed. That alone caused another week of procrastination!
Yesterday was the day for action!
It went surprisingly well. The kit required twelve bolts and nuts (thirteen of each were in the package) and thirty screws. Only 28 screws were sent, which caused a bit of a scramble to remember where I’d stored the toolbox that would probably (and it did!) have a couple screws in it. Otherwise, there were no major issues. Box spring assembled and double bed put together, sheets and comforter in place, I am happy to report this bed does not collapse when I get into it!
I was so bolstered by this success story, I went on to move the legs on my suitcase coffee table. That also went without a hitch!
Encouraged by this success, I’m wondering what I can accomplish today!
First, I’m going to tackle the crazy-making agenda of my life. I need a schedule. I am going to plan time to work on specific projects…but it can’t be all the time. I am going to figure out how to have time to do whatever I want, even if just a few minutes a day, without guilt over what I “should” be doing.
On this day, I’m going to start placing as much importance on living this life as I do on any other job.
That is, after all, the most important job any of us have.