I woke up early, my mind too busy for sleep. The whole day ahead of me, still too much to do. I weighed my options. I could get up early, get busy right away and maybe take a little nap later in the day. I could try to go back to sleep, get up at a reasonable time and work steadily through the day. I got up twice, put on my glasses and wandered through the house. Did I feel energetic enough to be up? Not really. Back to bed to try to sleep.
But sleep won’t come. Though I am warm and comfortable, I cannot sleep. My body rests, but my brain keeps racing from one thing to another. Some things – though still a bit overwhelming – are within my control. Others are not. I cannot, by wishing it, force a reply that I have been waiting days for. I cannot determine how someone else will react or respond, no matter how many possibilities I review. I cannot create funds where there are none. Time is limited, as is strength, and stamina, and enthusiasm. It is all of those things – out of my control – that won’t let me rest.
Finally, I get out of bed. The lighted clock on the stove says 4:45 as I start a pot of coffee. Dumping the old grounds, I note that the compost pail needs to be emptied and cleaned. One more thing to add to my list. I pour a glass of water and move to the desk, to see what else is on the agenda.
It rained last evening and through the night; finishing the lawn is out for today. There are clothes draped over the dryer door and stacked on the washing machine that have to be put away, towels in the washer to be put in the dryer, and a load of dark clothes to go into the washer. Water the plants, sweep through the house, clear the clutter from desk and tabletop, and clean the bathroom.
That’s the housekeeping list. I have others. There are at least five long lists regarding my news magazine: stories to write, billing to do, letters to answer, lists to update, files to set up. Either today or tomorrow, I have to make time for a couple interviews. There is a long list of studio tasks waiting for me if there is ever enough time. I have personal bills to pay, letters to write and records to update. Sigh. It’s not even light yet!
I pour a cup of coffee and turn on the computer. I check mail in two locations, then catch up on the news. With my second cup of coffee in hand, I play one game of on-line Scrabble. I watch one episode of Grace and Frankie on Netflix. I move on to this site to write my daily blog.
It is 6:45. I’m awake. The whole day is ahead of me. Let’s see what I can do with it!