Yesterday, I didn’t have to work at the hardware store.
I had a long list of things to do, anyway.
As usual, I accomplished only a fraction of what I hoped to.
By evening, faced with too much to do and too few hours to do it, I was working up to a big panic attack: stomach cramps, jitters, a big sense of failure, a black cloud of depression, the urge to run…the desire to hide…
I have been there before.
I took a deep breath…turned off the computer…made a simple dinner…read a little in a book that had nothing at all to do with any of the tasks looming over me…and went to bed.
It was the best thing I could do for myself.
Still, projects don’t take care of themselves.
I woke up this morning thinking of everything I’d left undone.
Two long days at the hardware store, the holiday with family then back to work through the weekend…when would I find the time? The energy?
As I made my way through the house in the dark, turning on lights and heaters, brewing coffee and getting ready for the day, these thoughts were looming. I felt stressed before I was even fully awake. I felt the pressure of responsibilities before the sun was up.
But then, as the sun came up, I saw what had happened as I slept.
Lots of it!
The plow trucks have not yet made their way down the Fox Lake Road.
There is a deep drift of snow that my car won’t make it through.
I’ll have to wait.
All of a sudden, I have time on my hands!